Q: Why do you hate faith?
A: Why do you hate reality?
Q: What do you think of Buddhists/Hindus/Sikhs/Jedi etc.?
A: I have no problem with any of them, as last time I checked they weren't trying to take over the world.
Q: Do you use a teleprompter or read from a script?
A: No. I know what I’m going to say. I don’t need to read it.
Q: Why don’t you answer comments to your videos?
A: I get an avalanche of e-mails every day and I reply to as many of those as I can. If I started replying to comments as well I’d have no time for anything else.
Q: You don’t know what it means to have faith.
A: I don’t know what it means to you, and I don’t want to know. That’s kind of the point.
Q: You don’t understand Christianity/Islam.
A: I don’t understand smallpox or typhoid either, and I’m equally disinclined to get acquainted with them.
Q: Why shouldn’t I be allowed to raise my kids religious if I want to?
A: The same reason you shouldn’t be allowed to beat them with a knotted rope.
Q: By antagonising religious people, aren’t you making it less likely they’ll agree with you?
A: I don’t want them to agree with me. I want them to shut up and maybe see a doctor.
Q: How do you respond to atheists who say you're too crude and simplistic?
A: They're probably right, as usual.
Q: Are you academically qualified?
A: No. I left school at sixteen. My first job was washing dishes in the revolving restaurant on top of the Post Office tower in London for five shillings an hour.
Q: Do you support the BNP?
A: No. I don't support any political party, especially not one of the far right.
Q: How do you vote in elections?
A: I usually vote for the fattest candidate, on the basis that they'll take up more room on the House of Commons benches, thereby giving me more democracy for my valuable franchise.
Q: Why do you attack Christianity when Islam is a bigger threat?
A: Because our indulgence of Christianity has encouraged Islam to claim equal status and threaten our freedom.
Q: I live in the American Bible Belt, and I’m afraid of social repercussions if I tell people I’m an atheist.
A: Well, I guess you’ll have to spend the rest of your life living a lie. Good luck with that.
Q: No, seriously. People would treat me like some kind of leper.
A: Take it as a compliment.
Q: My friends would disown me.
A: What friends?
Q: My family business would suffer.
A: OK, you win.
Q: I’d lose my job.
A: All right, we get it.
Q: Which books would you recommend?
A: All my favourite books are listed here.
Q: Can I book you as a guest on my radio/TV show?
A: No thanks. I’ve got better things to do than explain myself over and over again.
Q: Prove God doesn’t exist.
A: That’s a tough one. Show me how it’s done by proving Zeus and Apollo don’t exist, and I’ll use your method.